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The Deal Breaker on Becoming Jewish
The circumcision thing definitely is a big drawback. But they do get those cool little hats that would help cover my baldness, so that would be cool. I found out the other day one of the picture books I got my nieces free from Amazon is actually a Jewish one. If I read that to them, will they become Jewish? They at least wouldn't have to worry about being circumcised...
By: PT Dilloway on December 10, 2012
I'm thinking that might be a deal breaker for most men...
By: Shelly on December 10, 2012
Just as good (and making me squeeze my legs together) as the first time I read it.
By: Suldog on December 10, 2012
Well you certainly had good reasons to become Jewish. Lots of presents. You're pretty transparent sometimes. I'm guessing you already know that. Have a terrific day. :)
By: Comedy Plus on December 10, 2012
I really object to males being circumcised in our society. I consider it mutilation. And every religion considers themselves "chosen". Why would you make up something where you weren't the top dog (I know I know I'm atheist so all religions just seem to be crazy to me). But I have this one question to ask...why do any religions even try and define heaven. Why not just say "heaven is whatever i frickin want period. Everything." That at least seems logical and covers all the bases.
By: Michael Offutt on December 10, 2012
My sons got the best of both worlds. Their dad (my ex) is Christian and I'm Jewish. We have always celebrated both Christmas and Hanuakkah together. Our family Hanukkah party was yesterday. That having been said, I can't help but look at circumcision as wrong and neither of my boys have been surgically altered, much to the dismay of many of my relatives.
By: Hilary on December 10, 2012
Oh my gosh LMBO!! You do have a way of telling a story. LOve it. http://arewethereyettravelblog.blogspot.com/
By: Are We There Yet!! on December 10, 2012
As always you tell an entertaining story. Seems you have started a debate on the merits (or lack thereof) of circumcision I would guess that your brother was correct though. If you mother was a Roman Catholic...even a non-participating RC, she would of had an opinion about you becoming Jewish. I would like to think we have become more tolerant of religious differences...not entirely certain. I was a Lutheran that married a Dutch Reformed and you would of thought I was going to pollute the entire Dutch race. As it turned out the same Dutch church that said I couldn't touch my children within their church (my children were considered Dutch which I can only attribute to his sperm must know the Irish right out of my eggs) has now decided I can be buried in their cemetery. I should of told them "over my dead body but actually that is where I will be buried.
By: Cheryl P. on December 10, 2012
oh that was just a riot. i love the innocence and curiosity and that both you rmom and your friend gave good answers. that said, the phrase i will take away from this post.....penis whittling. bwahahahaha!!!
By: lime on December 10, 2012
I can't imagine going through that as an adult. I read that and....well, let's just say your couldn't drive a straight pin up my ass with a sledge hammer. No sir! Great story! S
By: scott park on December 10, 2012
Just thought I'd let you know I was here. Whether I'll ever be able to come back is another story!!
By: fishducky on December 10, 2012
A story to make everyone smile. Except maybe a newborn boy.
By: messymimi on December 10, 2012
Another great read! Makes me so glad I am female. ;) I'm trying the follow via email and we'll see how that works. :)
By: Rita McGregor on December 10, 2012
My doctor told me I should have Favorite Young Man circumcised so he'd look the same as his father, but I find it difficult to believe that FYM's dick is that tiny. Anyway, I didn't know what I was getting my baby into, and he was screaming in agony when the nurse brought him to me after it was done. I felt like shit, and I've always been sorry I didn't investigate the procedure. I think I would have said NO. I was young and dumb. Love, Janie
By: Janie Junebug on December 10, 2012
I am so happy we have that done when we are so young we won't remember it.
By: Brett Minor on December 10, 2012
Oh wow! The innocence of a child... great story!
By: Anne on December 11, 2012
This is so funny. Kids are prone to be religious, I think. When I was young I wanted to be Catholic so I could be a nun. I envied the Balestrino family and sometimes went to Mass with them. I loved wearing the hanky on my head, thought it was a precursor to my nun's habit.
By: Diane Laney Fitzpatrick on December 11, 2012
Great tale, my eyes were watering.
By: John on December 11, 2012
what's great about the story is the way you capture the decision making process of yourself as a kid - kids can get swayed by all sorts of things - i remember my first kiss, aged 5, because the girl told me that this meant we had to get married - and i felt a moment of sheer panic because it was way too early to make that kinda commitment and no - i never married her :)
By: dont feed the pixies on December 11, 2012
Stephen: It's amazing to think back at the adventures and views we had as kids. When a song came on the radio with lyrics we couldn't understand, we made up one's that sounded as closely to what we heard as possible. The outcome was hilarity!
By: Michael Manning on December 11, 2012
Speaking as a non-Jew who has been circumcised, I have to laugh at people who express outrage at the so-called mutilation issue. The real reason for circumcision is health and hygiene, and ya know, they do use a local anesthetic these days. That being said, fun story. But I have to disagree about something else. Maybe Jews get presents for eight days, but you gotta admit they don't hold a "candle" to the commercial excess brought to us by Christmas. Although I have to admit the Bar Mitzvah puts First Communion to shame when it comes to presents -- so I guess it all evens out in the end.)
By: Tom Sightings on December 11, 2012
Well. I really don't have much to contribute on the subjects of Judaism or circumcision. But I COULD recognize my own son's cries from the nursery when the doctor circumcised that batch of newborn boys.
By: Val on December 11, 2012
Such a great story, and at the exact right time of year. All I can remember from my circumcision is the awful smell (ether like) in the surgical theatre. And looking through the port hole window of the clinic where I could see my dad looking in with the strangest look on his face. He knew what was about to befall his first born. I was about 3, my memory is only partial, thank heavens!
By: Tom Cochrun on December 11, 2012
Stephen- I am not able to see all of the text- is it me or my server my pc or? Phooey.
By: Kathe W. on December 13, 2012
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